Beard Nets Are A Thing Now

As hipsters enter the food service industry, sales of beard nets are climbing even as sales of razors are falling. Well, what – other than food services – is a hipster with an art history degree going to do? Gotta pay off that $60,000 student loan somehow, right?

The current trend for beards in the UK is said to have stemmed from the ‘Hipster’ subculture of New York, characterised by a bushy beard, shaven hair at the side, and tattoos.

Clearly, the hipsters are demonstrating their inherent racism and prejudice against Native Americans (a.k.a. Indians), as these people are generally incapable of growing a beard.


About maxredlines

experience: biology, zoology, psychology. authored/co-authored papers appearing in peer-reviewed scientific journals, as well as numerous professional proceedings. authored articles appearing in computer-oriented publications. featured in publications ranging from books to New Yorker magazine to television.
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